University Challenged: Volume Sixteen (05.12.16)
One of the downsides to regularly tweeting about
University Challenge is whenever there’s a returning team, I can never remember if
I I've done the same jokes twice.
I suppose you could at least argue that I’m
consistent; my opinions are my opinions and those opinions seldom change. Particularly
when they’re related to that legend of this year’s showdowns: Eric Monkman. The
man’s a beauty of a contestant, who ticks all the right boxes (which are all
marked “Is he / she weird?”).
See below for this evening’s commentary; if
it resembles previous material, I’m sorry - but what can I do when it comes
from the same inspiration?
Wolfson Cambridge Vs. Jesus Cambridge. |
8:02pm: Do you remember when Paxman's hair looked like Wendy Craig's at the beginning of the series? MEMORIES.8:03pm: Monkman's back. YES.8:03pm: Morris Clarke: the missing Osmond.8:06pm: Every second Monkman's not on #UniversityChallenge is spent combing lard into his hair.8:08pm: "Jesus!". Fairbrother's parents, when he got back from the barbers'.8:09pm: Jesus' Morris Clarke is too comfortable in his own skin for a man wearing that type of shirt.8:10pm: Fairbrother is Bob Mortimer's son in House of Fools.8:12pm: Monkman used to be in Talking Heads.
8:12pm: Every time the camera zooms in on Monkman, I laugh.8:13pm: Chaudhri owns a van for kidnapping.8:16pm: Morris Clarke in panto.
8:19pm: Monkman has struggled to earn a living since the bottom fell out of the VHS market.
8:21pm: Chaudhri and Cosgrove should stage a smug-off.8:22pm: Monkman and Fairbrother's parents share the same brand of bowl.8:23pm: Paxman said "Masticate". Who could ask for anything more?8:24pm: Jesus have a cock as a mascot. Appropriate.8:25pm: Roger Tilling is easily pleased.8:26pm: Stare through Morris Clarke's shirt and you'll see a dolphin.8:27pm: Wolfson Cambridge display the various stages of hair loss.8:29pm: Morris Clarke. Flamboyant.