mostly david ephgrave

Forgive my hyperbole, but I was so shocked by Manon’s surprise exit from tonight’s Bake Off I’m still recovering from the whiplash. While he’s been a clear front-runner throughout the series, judging from his performance this week I thought it was a done deal that Rahul would go. I was so certain I’d metaphorically brought his car around to the tent entrance with the engine still running; even he looked sure too, displaying the low level delirium (if there’s such a thing) of a person who’d fully come to terms with the state of play and was relieved to be done with it. So why did Manon get voted out? The answer is I don’t really know. Paul Hollywood made a few references to her baking more like a French person than a Danish one tonight (which was the theme of the show) but even this feedback sound like it had been tacked on afterwards; her baking may have been a tad less complicated this week, but there’s still no reason to banish her when someone else had so clearly struggled und...

Today, I came hurtling back down soutb, arriving with just enough time to catch the first episode of the news series of The Great British Bake-Off. Firstly, we had to contend with the fact it was on a different channel, although we'e had plenty of advance warning of this in the meida; then there was the fact only £33% of the shows original presenters were even going to be present, which is a huge change to contend with.although I'm pleased to report there was no need to be concerned as it all worked perfectly - though I have to admit, were concerned I might fall asleep during it, what wite the epic day I've had. I also tweeted along to tonight's programme; here's what I said:   8:40PM: One good thing about #GBBO switching to Channel Four is the advert breaks will provide ample opportunity to go out and buy cake. 8:07PM: Running your fingers through Paul Hollywood's hair would cut them to shreds (speaks a man who knows) ...

Jon Snow’s socks go all the way up.  At least that’s my theory. He certainly loves showing them off. No Channel Four News trailer would be complete without a bit of gratuitous ankle. It’s like he’s trying to mesmerise his audience. Perhaps he thinks his footwear will soften the blow of any shocking stories. Either that, or he’s under the misapprehension that he’s a cheeky Victorian woman. It’s a desperate attempt to impress personality on proceedings; a way of saying ‘I may be a newsreader, but I’m just like you’. He may as well wear a t-shirt with 'I’m Not As Think As You Drunk I Am' emblazoned on the front (though I doubt the C4 producers would allow this). I bet it’s more than just a pair of socks. I suspect he’s sporting a stripy, one-piece body stocking under that suit. Let’s hope we never find out. I doubt my heart could cope with it.   Jon Snow's socks have their own Facebook Page. Check it out .

One thing The Crystal Maze proved is that it's never easy to complete a task with a group of people watching from a window, shouting dubious advice. Appearing on the show must have been an exercise in patience. I would have been just seconds into my first game before screaming at the other contestants to 'SHUT THE FUCK UP'. Either that, or I'd have crouched in the corner, sobbing uncontrollably. Completing a brainteaser is never simplified with an audience, particularly one that insists on stating the bleeding obvious. It’s worse when you know that no-one had met before filming. They're not friends egging each other on, but strangers, hell-bent on securing an adventure holiday. It’s survival of the fittest. Weak links had to be sniffed out quickly. (Did the winners all go on holiday together? Imagine the awkwardness.) All that unhelpful shouting must have made it difficult to concentrate. You’d also have to blank out Richard O’Brien’s harmon...