mostly david ephgrave

Much as I have done many a year previously, this evening I found myself tweeting along with tonight's Eurovision Song Contest. I decided to immortalise my commentary for the sake of future generations. Here goes:  8:01PM: Surely all the contestants should travel separately though, like with the royal family.  8:04PM: Didn't I see the host sitting on top of my nan's toilet roll once? 8:05PM: Will Theresa May step off the plane to the tune of Dancing Queen? 8:07PM: Dana International forgot to take her outfit off its coat-hanger. 8:10PM: Because pyros & planes definitely mix.  8:13PM: I can't wait for Papa Bendi. 8:19PM: Malta: poor man's Joss Stone.  8:20PM: Sometimes, I perform in the second position. 8:23PM: Having to halt my #Eurovision viewing experience to call my dad to remind him the Amazon Echo name he needs to remember is Alexa.  Not Melissa. Not Electra.  (I wrote it on a piece of paper and stuck it to his bedside table) It's ALEXA. 8:25P...

Like much of the country (bar Nigel Farage, Jacob Rees Mogg and probably Boris Johnson) I watched last night’s Eurovision, and like many others, I tweeted along to it. I was so busy doing this, in fact, I actually missed the moment when the guy invaded the stage as I was looking at my phone; I was just about to tweet something along the lines of “What was the rap break about?” when I realised it wasn’t part of it. See below for my commentary on last night's show; you could even catch up with it on iPlayer while reading along - like watching The Wizard of Oz while listening to Dark Side of the Moon - though that’s a lot of effort. 8:05PM: "...which is Portuguese..." 8:07PM: Will this song ever kick in? With that many drummers, it's got to kick in. 8:08PM: They should rename this the Camp Olympics. 8:09PM: Or 'The Camplympics'. 8:11PM: The Czech Republic are being represented by Matt...

People of my age and their parents tend to have a different vision of Europe (see what I did there?) hence the result of last year’s EU Referendum; consequently, I can’t imagine many Daily Mail-reading UK residents beyond retirement age enjoying last night’s Song Contest, despite having grown up with it too, when the vast majority of them made it clear they'd like to keep mainland Europe at a distance (unless they live on the Costa del Sol). This certainly isn’t the case for me, particularly when faced with such out-and-out camp; Eurovision is always entertaining, notwithstanding the fact my taste in music is so at odds with the competition’s usual fare. So it was that I found myself in front of the TV tonight with my wife, a couple of beers and a range of Euro-snacks, tweeting along to proceedings. See below for my unsolicited commentary: 8:02pm: Twice this year, my TV stopped working at a key moment: once as Big Ben stuck midnight on New Yea...

Watching a clip of Terry Wogan’s final emotional Radio 2 sign-off on BBC Breakfast this morning reminded me just how warm, distinctive and individual his voice really was. For a child of the Eighties like me, it was ever-present; be it on his chat show, on his famously cutting commentary of the Eurovision Song Contest, on Children in Need or on Blankety Blank. It was something I took for granted, as it had always been there; even if he wasn’t in attendance himself, when the likes of Steve Coogan, Rob Brydon and Peter Serafinowicz would lovingly supply those instantly recognisable lilting inflections in his absence. He somehow managed to be both mainstream and left-field; cheekily poking fun at those around him, and more often at himself. He was a safe, yet off-kilter pair of hands to be left in, particularly when the show he was presenting was loose enough for him to improvise as he would like (which was the ones with long running-times - such as Eurovision and Children i...

It may surprise some people to learn that I'm a big fan of the Eurovision Song Contest. I watched the competition from from beginning to end tonight, and tweeted along. See these posts below, live-blog-style, in all their four-hour glory. If you get to the end, you win a prize of similar value to the Eurovision trophy. You won't need to up your contents insurance, believe me. (N.B. As far as I'm concerned, the best country won.) [ View the story "Ephgrave's Eurovision 2015." on Storify ]