mostly david ephgrave

I’ve gone off University Challenge a little of late, both as a quiz show and as a source of humour. I think it’s fair to say there hasn’t been a contestant of equally surreal stature since Monkman featured two series ago, and that’s far too long for my liking; yes, there’s been the occasional awkward moment that inspires a laugh but they’re few and far between. So it is that comedically I find myself clutching at straws trying to find humour in the most inconsequential details, though to be fair, that pretty much describes my whole life. See below what I said about the show on Twitter. UCL Vs. King's London (08.10.18) 8:33PM: You don't want to know what I keep stored in my south cloister. 8:34PM: I've got an average age of twenty-three. 8:34PM: Look through King's Jones' top to see a three-dimensional dolphin. 8:35PM: There should be more spelling on television. 8:42PM: Gentleman-b...

I barely took part in my usual Monday evening tweet-along-to-University-Challenge-athon this evening for a couple of reasons: (1) because I’ve grown a little bored of the show if I’m honest, and (2) I’m feeling a bit less childish of late. I read an article a few weeks back, written from the perspective of a few contestants who’ve appeared on the game show and weren’t prepared for the virtual onslaught they received online as a result of this, literally in a virtual sense. The article was mostly written from the point of view of women who felt the way they looked took priority over their actual abilities, which is something I don’t believe I’m guilty of, yet it still made me think. I’d like to hope what I do is never seen as an attack; I’m not seeking these people out directly and copying them in to my feedback, and the sort of thing I write is meant to be harmless and comedic, but it’s so easy to cross a line so that's no longer the case. This...

Tonight’s episode of University Challenge was one of those rare occasions where one of the teams competing wasn’t from Cambridge or Oxford. At least normality was vaguely restored by the male to female contestant ratio with only two of the eight students taking part coming from the latter camp; it was almost as if they were trying to adhere to the BBC panel show policy of having a one-female-panelist minimum (which they seem to take far too literally by more often than not having just one taking part). As ever, I tweeted along to the show, my rather childish sense of humour revealing I didn’t go to Cambridge or Oxford either; I went to an unaccredited drama school, so the less said about that, the better. York Vs. St Edmund Hall - Oxford (03.09.18) 8:32PM: Palazzo; poor man's Doctor Who. 8:33PM: Palazzo's cardigan looks like a living, breathing, GROWING thing. 8:34PM: Leo's murder count is beyond counting. 8:36PM: Some of Oxford's team haven...

I spent my last evening in Edinburgh live-tweeting University Challenge, during a brief break from tidying my digs to a reasonable standard for me to bugger off back down South. It appealed to my OCD that I managed to tweet once per minute for the first six minutes of the show; I only wish I could have kept it up all the way through. See below what was said not quite so frequently: Strathclyde Vs. Durham (27.08.18) 8:31PM: I'll probably be tweeting about #UniversityChallenge for a bit. Sorry. 8:32PM: Is it me, or is Paxman starting to resemble someone's mum? 8:33PM: The first two chaps from Team Strathclyde would "cut yer". 8:34PM: Cameron Yule's collar position was no accident. 8:35PM: Moll Flanders; best sung to the tune of Goldfinger. 8:36PM: Toynbee: hair like an otter's pelt. 8:38PM: Strathclyde Pollock: a form of jig. 8:42PM: Pollock - P + B = Bollock ...

For a terrifying seven-minute period, I thought I’d have to abandon my Twitter coverage of tonight’s episode of University Challenge as my phone froze completely and wouldn’t work. Thank God I had my laptop to hand, or there would have been at least five people out there deeply disappointed they weren't able read my usual pithy (or take-the-piss-y) commentary. But I wasn’t prepared to let technology stand in my way. If all else failed, I would have sprinted up Arthur’s Seat - as I’m currently staying just around the corner from it - and orated my intended tweets like the Dalai Lama from a mountain top; provided I had sufficient Wi-Fi coverage to watch it on iPlayer that is. See below for my slightly late-starting social media-based thoughts. Clare - Cambridge Vs. Hertford - Oxford (20.08.18) 8:37PM: "I'm reading Law..."  (Huh)  (What is it good for?)  "...absolutely..."  (Nothing)  ...

I don’t let taking part in the biggest arts festival on the planet stand in the way of live-Tweeting University Challenge; when the nation expects a service, you can’t say no. Tonight’s show was dominated by Davis’ facial hair and general demeanour, which reeked of smug git; they say you should never judge a book by its cover, but what if the cover includes a wax-styled tache? It didn’t help that he distinctly reminded me of three people I know and find particularly self-satisfied and may even have been projecting their traits onto Davis’ undeserving shoulders, but I wouldn’t bet on it; you can’t really look like that without being similarly contrived. See below for the usual concise social-media-bitching that’s neither big, nor clever.   SOAS Vs. Darwin - Cambridge (13.08.18) 8:34PM: Hoodie under a leather jacket; interesting choice. 8:35PM: Davis thinks he's Dali. We think he's a gimp. 8:37PM: Mulley looks li...

The nature of live-tweeting a TV programme is you can’t please everybody, though sometimes, you can’t please the people who were actually in it. Not amused. These days, everyone’s a critic, which is kind of ironic as tomorrow I head to the Edinburgh Fringe where they’re particularly rife. So it’s fitting that one of my tweets should disappoint someone this evening - namely one of the contestants in tonight’s show - if only to warm me up for next month. I’m prepared to admit the tweet wasn’t exactly an example of sparkling wit, but it was pretty innocuous; at the very least, it was unremarkable enough to avoid comment; it’s weird what people take offense to. Outside of this, there was little of note during tonight’s show, other than Morris’ impressively sizeable Afro. See below for what I said about this evening’s programme too. Pembroke - Oxford Vs. Downing - Cambridge (30.07.18) 8:32PM: Morris shows promise. 8:34PM: Lamb...

To everything, turn, turn, turn, There is a season, turn turn, turn. And a time for a every new series of University Challenge under Heaven. Today saw the second episode of the new run of University Challenge, which   - as I was out hosting the first night in our Mostly Comedy Festival - means I’ve already started the series a week behind, playing catch-up. Tonight’s show was a largely understated affair, save for the inclusion of Glasgow’s Barn, who I’m pretty sure was desperate for us to notice he was back on another game show; he’s like a really lacklustre less-sinister Pennywise.   Emmanuel Cambs Vs Glasogow (30.06.1 8:33PM: If there's no Monkaman equivalent this year, I'm doing a Phil Collins / Sean Connery and threatening to leave the country. 8:34PM: Harris wins the prize for first #UniversityChallenge murderer of the series. 8:35PM: Look at Barn, leaning into Whiteford. Cheeky. 8:36P...

Lowery is the closest thing we’ve had to a classic University Challenge contestant this series, though his old-fashioned garb doesn’t provoke as much hilarity as a single, extreme facial expression from Monkman. Oh, how I miss Monkman and his Monkmanny ways, which made each appearance comedy gold. There just hasn’t been anything to match that this year, which is very disappointing as it’s the only reason I watch it, really; I crave as many self-conscious students on the programme as possible to at least make me feel a little better about myself; when it comes to University Challenge, I’m a selfish audience member. Even though this year’s series hasn’t excited me as much I still persist with the live tweeting most nights. Here’s tonight’s Twitter record… 8:33PM: Woodland: eyebrows like inverted commas. 8:34PM: Lowery, sponsored by affectation. 8:37PM: Thomas' hobbies include taxidermy, trapping animals with the intention...