mostly david ephgrave

I spent my last evening in Edinburgh live-tweeting University Challenge, during a brief break from tidying my digs to a reasonable standard for me to bugger off back down South. It appealed to my OCD that I managed to tweet once per minute for the first six minutes of the show; I only wish I could have kept it up all the way through. See below what was said not quite so frequently: Strathclyde Vs. Durham (27.08.18) 8:31PM: I'll probably be tweeting about #UniversityChallenge for a bit. Sorry. 8:32PM: Is it me, or is Paxman starting to resemble someone's mum? 8:33PM: The first two chaps from Team Strathclyde would "cut yer". 8:34PM: Cameron Yule's collar position was no accident. 8:35PM: Moll Flanders; best sung to the tune of Goldfinger. 8:36PM: Toynbee: hair like an otter's pelt. 8:38PM: Strathclyde Pollock: a form of jig. 8:42PM: Pollock - P + B = Bollock ...

For a terrifying seven-minute period, I thought I’d have to abandon my Twitter coverage of tonight’s episode of University Challenge as my phone froze completely and wouldn’t work. Thank God I had my laptop to hand, or there would have been at least five people out there deeply disappointed they weren't able read my usual pithy (or take-the-piss-y) commentary. But I wasn’t prepared to let technology stand in my way. If all else failed, I would have sprinted up Arthur’s Seat - as I’m currently staying just around the corner from it - and orated my intended tweets like the Dalai Lama from a mountain top; provided I had sufficient Wi-Fi coverage to watch it on iPlayer that is. See below for my slightly late-starting social media-based thoughts. Clare - Cambridge Vs. Hertford - Oxford (20.08.18) 8:37PM: "I'm reading Law..."  (Huh)  (What is it good for?)  "...absolutely..."  (Nothing)  ...

I don’t let taking part in the biggest arts festival on the planet stand in the way of live-Tweeting University Challenge; when the nation expects a service, you can’t say no. Tonight’s show was dominated by Davis’ facial hair and general demeanour, which reeked of smug git; they say you should never judge a book by its cover, but what if the cover includes a wax-styled tache? It didn’t help that he distinctly reminded me of three people I know and find particularly self-satisfied and may even have been projecting their traits onto Davis’ undeserving shoulders, but I wouldn’t bet on it; you can’t really look like that without being similarly contrived. See below for the usual concise social-media-bitching that’s neither big, nor clever.   SOAS Vs. Darwin - Cambridge (13.08.18) 8:34PM: Hoodie under a leather jacket; interesting choice. 8:35PM: Davis thinks he's Dali. We think he's a gimp. 8:37PM: Mulley looks li...

To everything, turn, turn, turn, There is a season, turn turn, turn. And a time for a every new series of University Challenge under Heaven. Today saw the second episode of the new run of University Challenge, which   - as I was out hosting the first night in our Mostly Comedy Festival - means I’ve already started the series a week behind, playing catch-up. Tonight’s show was a largely understated affair, save for the inclusion of Glasgow’s Barn, who I’m pretty sure was desperate for us to notice he was back on another game show; he’s like a really lacklustre less-sinister Pennywise.   Emmanuel Cambs Vs Glasogow (30.06.1 8:33PM: If there's no Monkaman equivalent this year, I'm doing a Phil Collins / Sean Connery and threatening to leave the country. 8:34PM: Harris wins the prize for first #UniversityChallenge murderer of the series. 8:35PM: Look at Barn, leaning into Whiteford. Cheeky. 8:36P...

I sometimes wonder why I live-tweet University Challenge so incessantly. Is it a way of shifting focus from the clear gaps in knowledge when it comes to the subject-matter of most of the show’s questions? I see myself as a reasonably intelligent human being with a fairly wide field of reference until I turn to BBC2 on a Monday evening, when I morph into a gibbering, dribbling cretin. At least with Only Connect (which they now air before University Challenge, which is a mistake: it used to be quiz-show dessert, but now it’s a misplaced first course) I stand a fighting chance; with University Challenge, the only one-upmanship I can muster is I’m marginally less socially awkward than the show’s contestants…though it's probably a close-run thing. See below for tonight’s childish Twitter ramblings: Merton - Oxford Vs. Edinburgh (12.03.18) 8:32PM: Paxman looks so very, very, very, very weary. 8:33PM: Thomas looks like a Nazi a...

Today saw another thrilling installment of University Challenge with all the usual ingredients, from a scornful Paxman to a bearded tit (which is a birdwatcher's favourite). As ever, I found myself less enamoured with the questions and more interested in the contestants' appearance, which I know is childish, but that's the way these things go. See below for what I said on Twitter: Bristol Vs. Ulster (05.03.18) 8:33PM: Jeremy Paxman is the dictionary definition of phoning it in. 8:33PM: If the waistcoat weren't enough: the facial hair. 8:35PM: Bowes is a tool. 8:36PM: Bowes thinks Tin Machine was Bowie's finest work, just to appear interesting. 8:37PM: Bowes' beard looks like a thicket. 8:38PM: Bowes' hair is on loan from Barry Humphries. 8:40PM: Jeremy NO Paxman NO loves NO the NO word NO. 8:42PM: Got any salmon, Hosegood? LOVELY. 8:45PM: Jeremy Paxman shows disdain for the quest...

I felt terribly frustrated for not coming back in time to tweet along to last week’s University Challenge; all the more reason I was ready and prepared today for it today. Taking the mickey out of overly-knowledgeable, poorly dressed students is all I’ve got. See below for today’s tweets:  St. John's Cambridge Vs. Ulster (12.02.18) 8:34PM: A Devine-Stoneman. 8:35PM: Levin's mantra: "mime is money". 8:36PM: Levin wouldn’t have looked out of place in a Fifties’ coffee shop. 8:38PM: McKeown and sibilant answers don't mix. 8:39PM: McDaid is Angelos Epithemiou's McDad. 8:41PM: Going to a # UniversityChallenge recording must be a laugh a minute. 8:42PM: The longer you look, the more pronounced Devine-Stoneman's Adam's apple becomes. 8:44PM: Imagine how stressed Paxman would make you feel while threading a needle: "COME ON”. 8:49PM: "Come on, co...

Tonight’s University Challenge saw a Cambridge college take on a college in Oxford; is it me, or are the teams always from there? I know there are a number of colleges in both cities, and I know both cities are famed for their top-quality education (you may not be aware of this) but still, can’t some other places have a crack of the whip? I want to see scarily well-read students from different privileged backgrounds, and not just the same two boat-race locations going at it; if not, I’m going to write a strongly-worded letter to Points of View (but only if it’s read out on the air by someone with suitable vocal standing; James Earl Jones, perhaps?) See below for my tweets about tonight's show: Fitzwilliam - Cambridge Vs. Merton - Oxford (05.02.18) 8:33PM: Typical two-out-of-four Theo team average. 8:34PM: Tindall killed five people...and that's just today. 8:35PM: Tindall's hair and Fuzzy Felt have the sam...