mostly david ephgrave

Why do football managers at press conferences act like they’re discussing a massive humanitarian incident with thousands of casualties? They take it far too seriously. IT’S JUST A FUCKING GAME. There’s only so much levity they can add to proceedings – a pratfall would be out of place – but there’s no need to approach things so somberly. Nobody died. Unless, of course, they did. Another thing I hate about football is the sound of the crowd. There are plenty of intelligent, sensible well-meaning people who follow it (including my parents, who’ve have had season tickets for Spurs since the late 60s), but cram them into a stadium and collectively, they emit the vapid drone of ignorami; all open, brainless vowel sounds and faux Cockney. At worst, their chants turn racist and homophobic. A football crowd can be an angry, ignorant, threatening place. (Perhaps it’s just me. I'm an unsporty wimp.) I was recently travelling back from a comedy gig in Brighton on the same day ...