GBBO 2017: Week Seven (10.10.17)

Tonight I had to ask myself a searching question: how am I supposed to survive the rest of this year’s Great British Bake Off now Yan’s no longer in the tent?

She’s been my favourite baker of the series; not only for her clear technical ability, but also for her attitude. She has an amusing preciseness that’s very entertaining and her creations have been exceptional almost across the board; until tonight, that is, when her luck ran out a bit. This was a shame, as it would have only taken slightly different circumstances for things to fall the other way.

As ever, I tweeted along with tonight’s show; see below for my mumblings:

8:01PM: "Absolute Disaster"; my favourite Bowie album.

8:03PM: STEVEN: "The Naked Bake Off"; The Great British Clothes Off, surely?

8:07PM: Steven's making Italian Style Cannoli; so he's making cannoli then?

8:08PM: My favourite Roy Orbison song is Only Cannoli.

8:09PM: Ricotta Pick a Pocket or Two.

8:10PM: Paul Hollywood gets redder with each passing shot.

8:12PM: Tonight's incidental music sounds like Simply the Best arranged for xylophone.

8:22PM: Paul Hollywood's hair is the hardest substance known to man.

8:24PM: The Bake Off does wonders for the xylophone-playing session musician community.

8:24PM: Paul Hollywood's hair could cut glass.

8:27PM: Yan's pizza dough, like Alan Partridge, is bouncing back.

8:30PM: I love Yan's earnestness.

8:31PM: I always measure my pizzas with a ruler.

8:34PM: Kate: "Can I put mine in the bin?"

That's been done before, Kate, and it didn't go down well.

8:42PM: I had the cannolis once. Couldn't leave the house.

8:45PM: Imagine Paul Hollywood Trick or Treating; you'd give him your wallet.

8:47PM: The bakers in the tent are struggling to make their sfogliatelle; I'm struggling to spell it.

8:49PM: Stacey's Pastry Suprise. Cilla's Surprise Surprise.

8:56PM: I watch this to relax, would you believe it.

9:02PM: "Sfogliatelle's all mine all mine. Sfogliatelle's all mine..."

9:05PM: My wife: "Is Prue wearing a ball gag as a necklace?"

9:10PM: ...but I love Jan.

9:12PM: Noooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo.