GBBO 2018: Volume Two (05.09.18)
Tonight saw the second installment of this year’s Bake-Off, which once again made people from all walks of life up and down the country disproportionately stressed about cake.
The sticking point, as ever, seemed to be the fact the bakers in the tent aren’t given enough time to do what they do in such inevitably hot conditions; surely the most common factor to come up in Paul, Prue or Mary(oh, how I miss Mary)’s - critique would be how much better the final product would have been if it had had time to set. It would be hard enough to bake in such a tight window in a normal kitchen without doing it in a marquee under bright lights (on what always seems to be the hottest day of the year).
As ever, I watched the programme through my fingers, occasionally disbanding my hand-based fortress to tweet. I do this because the people of the internet need to know the opinion of a man who seldom bakes; this is the service I offer to the nation for free.
The sticking point, as ever, seemed to be the fact the bakers in the tent aren’t given enough time to do what they do in such inevitably hot conditions; surely the most common factor to come up in Paul, Prue or Mary(oh, how I miss Mary)’s - critique would be how much better the final product would have been if it had had time to set. It would be hard enough to bake in such a tight window in a normal kitchen without doing it in a marquee under bright lights (on what always seems to be the hottest day of the year).
As ever, I watched the programme through my fingers, occasionally disbanding my hand-based fortress to tweet. I do this because the people of the internet need to know the opinion of a man who seldom bakes; this is the service I offer to the nation for free.
8:06PM: I'm a nice active little queen. That's why I've got a musical theatre diploma.
8:08PM: I like how Jon shares his wardrobe with Black Lace.
8:13PM: I'd like to stage a Karen / Prue 'Looking at Each Other the Rim of Their Glasses' Stare-off.
8:20PM: Antony's beard is made of fuzzy felt.
8:24PM: I hope when I die they shroud my body in gingham.
8:25PM: Any favourite cake of Claude Monet is a favourite cake of mine.
8:32PM: They look pretty green, so they must be Paul Weller's favourite cake too.
8:44PM: Terry (left).
8:49PM: I watch the Bake-Off to relax, when in reality all it does is make me stressed.
9:02PM: When do you ever call a cake boring?
9:11PM: I hope that bird of prey doesn't catch that lamb.
