Skip to main content

University Challenged: Volume Twenty-one (23.01.17)


The end of the current series of University Challenge is sneaking ever closer and inevitably, the faces of the contestants have grown very familiar.

We’ve already dined out on Venkatesh’s keenness that masks a slight murderousness and Clarke’s disdainful venom. That’s not to say we can’t enjoy them again, particularly in the case of the latter; my God, did Clarke have a cob on this evening; even Paxman must have approached her tentatively.

See below for tonight’s tweets:

Bristol Vs. Corpus Christi - Oxford (23.01.17)
7:33pm: Rolleston's wearing a surprisingly narrow waistcoat.

7:34pm: Venkatesh has a murderous resting face.

7:35pm: There's no substance thicker than the lenses of Fleet's glasses.

7:36pm: With a waistcoat like that, it's no wonder Rolleston will end up teaching history.

7:37pm: Mess with Bristol's Clarke at your peril.

7:38pm: Bristol's Clarke is a woman with attitude.

7:39pm: Clarke's far too busy for this #UniversityChallenge lark.

7:40pm: Bristol's Clarke.


7:43pm: 2. Bristol’s Clarke.


7:47pm: The longer the programme goes on, the more irritated Clarke gets about being there.

7:50pm: The last thing Clarke wants to do is waste thirty minutes in the company of these eight cretins (Paxman included).

7:51pm: Venkatesh likes that; not a lot, but he likes it.

7:52pm: *Idea for a pantomime with Bristol's Clarke as the Wicked Queen and Corpus Christi's Johnson as the good fairy.*

7:53pm: Fleet can see through walls with those glasses.

7:55pm: Bristol Clarke's tut is as loud as thunderclap.

7:57pm: A single withering look from Clarke can empty a room in seconds.

7:59pm: Bristol Clarke's mantra: "I'm seriously fucked off with this. I'm seriously fucked off with this.
Labels:

Popular posts from this blog

Shakerpuppetmaker.

Have Parker from Thunderbirds and Noel Gallagher ever been seen in the same room? The resemblance is uncanny. So much so, I think something’s afoot. If my suspicions are correct, I've stumbled across a secret that will blow the music and puppet industry wide apart. In the mid-60s / mid-90s at least. It doesn’t take long to see the signposts. There’s the similarity between the name of Oasis’ first single, Supersonic, and Supermarianation, Gerry Anderson’s puppetry technique. The Gallagher brothers would often wear Parkas . Live Forever was clearly a reference to Captain Scarlet and Standing on the Shoulder of Giants to the size difference between Noel and his bandmates. The more you think about it, the more brazen it gets. It’s fishier than Area 51, Paul is Dead and JFK's assassination put together. The only glitch to the theory is scale . According to Wikipedia, Anderson’s marionettes were 1’10” and Gallagher is 5’8”. How does he maintain an illusion of avera...
Read more

"Speaking Words of Wisdom, Let it Shine."

Tonight saw the second instalment of BBC1’s latest advertise-a-musical-for-months-and-then-cast-it-with-performers-too-inexperienced-to-do-it-a-thon ‘Let it S̶h̶i̶t̶e̶ Shine’ (or as I call it: ‘REAL AUDITIONS ARE NOTHING LIKE THIS’). I didn’t watch it (clearly), but being reminded of how angry seeing just five minutes of it made me last week caused me to mull over what I would call a musical based on the band’s songbook, if I was responsible for it. Here are a my suggestions: IDEAS FOR TITLE OF A TAKE THAT MUSICAL: Barlow! Dirty Fat-Dancing Orange! A Million Love-changes-everything Songs Owen! Howard's End Pray Misérables Mamma Marka! Babe (with a pig as the lead) …BUT MY FAVOURITE HAS TO BE: Jason & His Amazing Technicolour Dreamcoat. "It was Orange, Orange, Orange, Orange..." (TAKE) THAT’S ENOUGH OF (TAKE) THAT.
Read more

'...I'm Gonna Look at You 'til My Eyes Go Blind."

Over the past week or two, I’ve been on a bit of a Sheryl Crow kick, largely thanks to rediscovering her cover of one of my most-liked Bob Dylan songs. She has one of my favourite female voices, yet despite this, I only own one CD and that’s just a single (her '97 release ‘Hard to Make a Stand’); on that basis, you can only imagine how much of her back catalogue I’d own if I hated her (it would fall into minus-figures). Dylan, conversely, takes up more of my collection than anyone else, save The Beatles and Paul McCartney’s solo work. He’s one of those artists who, when you get him, you really get him - and once I’d tuned into his style as a student, I'd time and again be blown away by his lyrics; he’ll have more jaw-dropping imagery in one track than other people fit in a whole career. These days, I mostly listen to music in the morning when getting ready, and more often than not, this will consist of a suggested YouTube playlist when I’m in the bath, r...
Read more