Monday, 23 January 2017

Coming to a Head.

Is it weird to visit a barbers' you’ve never been to before to request a guy who used to run the shop next to you, but moved without warning to this other business, which you only happened to notice the other day when you saw him in there as you walked past?

For most people, the answer would be, “No”, yet for me, the answer is, “Probably”. I don’t live in the same dimension as the rest of the planet; I exist in a world where any case of awkwardness is ramped up to a hundred-and-ten and I’ll always be the one to take the brunt of it; I’m one of the privileged few who could be given a strange look by a passerby who'd just shat themselves willingly and still come out worse.

The sticking point that will make me take the risk is the fact he ‘gives good haircut’. He takes his time and barely needs any guidance. I can just sit quietly, knowing I’m in as safe scissored hands as if I were in the chair of Johnny Depp (when he’s playing Edward and not Sweeney).

I know it won’t be simple. I’ll have to circle the shop a few times before going in, to make sure he’s working. I’ll have to decide if it’s safe to mention the sudden closing down of his business (do his new colleagues know about this?). I’ll probably come out with a crew cut, because I’m too scared to say he's taken off enough...but at least I’ll be trimmed by a man who’s trimmed me before; this always take precedence.

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