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Strictly Come Tweeting: (13.10.18)


What with all the intense press interest in the turbulent love life of Seann Walsh, Katiya and his ex this week it’s probably hard for them to just carry on with dancing; I, for one, think it’s largely irrelevant to the show and shouldn’t be constantly reiterated to the point of making everything desperately uncomfortable.

Despite the fact the programme tried to rise above it and only mentioned the problems briefly so as not to appear remiss, there was still an atmosphere when the couple danced that you could cut with a knife, and not a sharp one really; this is proof of the damage social media can do.

Speaking of social media, I live tweeted along with today’s gig. Feel free to look through it and add comments yourself.

6:46PM: Joe Sugg's dad is Suggs; Suggs' dad is Suggss.

6:48PM: I didn't know #Strictly had its own bank; must be funded by our TV licences.

6:49PM: There's a run on the bank. Don't tell David Tomlinson.

6:52PM: Darcey has glittery hedgehogs hanging from her ears (which sounds like a diction exercise).

6:53PM: Martin Kemp did a smokey guff.

6:57PM: You Can't Hurry Love; the anti-premature ejaculation anthem.

7:04PM: Every time the judges' score is my PIN, I down a shot.

7:06PM: Great vocal performance then.

7:12PM: The first rumba of the season: there's a change in the air.

7:13PM: I'm not entirely sure Faye's wearing anything.

7:15PM: Faye's dress had a Bullseye speedboat pushed through it in the early Eighties.

7:20PM: I think Katie Piper's an exceptional person.

7:40PM: Great performance from Lauren.

7:41PM: Tess: the human dictaphone.

7:47PM: I'd like to pop Dr Ranj in my top pocket like biro.

7:52PM: I've always said there's not enough Totò on prime-time TV.

7:58PM: Aljaž: The Man From U.N.C.L.E.

7:59PM: Alan Dedicoat is #Strictly’s Siri.

8:02PM: Imagine @glyndoggett doing Graeme Swann's routine: double-yes.

8;04PM: Graeme's got sparkly dandruff.

8:09PM: Ashley's livid.

8:15PM: "I need access to a Charleston expert."

8:17PM: She just walked up his facking back. Christ.

8:18PM: Is anyone else expecting a sniper?

8:27PM: At least 80% of my life's been spent playing Hi Ho Silver Lining in some show or other; at least 80%

8:29PM: Was Kev's cake made in Ireland?

8:30PM: Kevin deserves votes just for headbutting the cake.

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