Strictly Come Tweeting: Week Nine (19.11.16)


One thing everyone involved with Strictly seems to drone on about all series is Blackpool Week, at least until tonight, when they’ll probably pipe down about it for another year.

While I understand the importance of the town to the ballroom world, I’m never that excited at the prospect of the programme coming from there, primarily because I’ve actually been to Blackpool, which I loved as a child, but less so as an adult; it makes Great Yarmouth look positively glamorous.

See below for my tweets about tonight’s show (with a big prediction as to one of next series’ contestants at the end; I bet I’m right):

7:00pm: That awkward moment when Will Young appears in the #Strictly opening credits.

7:02pm: The musical theatre songs I hate the most are songs about musical theatre.

7:05pm: No one's squeezing MY slow winkleman.

7:06pm: Tess' sympathetic "Awwww" due to Daisy Lowe leaving made me swear and shake my fist at the television.

7:08pm: Tess Daly was taught emotions by a Vulcan.

7:11pm: Not changing the lyrics to "Hey #Strictly, you're so fine, you're so fine you blow my mind" was missing a trick.

7:14pm: Calling Claudia a tiny mistake isn't fair.

7:17pm: Well, we won't be able to watch any dancing now that Peter Kay's made it all about him.

7:21pm: Somebody call Esther Rantzen; That's Life! is finally back on prime-time TV.

7:23pm: Bruno's subtle reference to Brucie's Play Your Cards Right was much appreciated.

7:24pm: I've got the longest flagpole in history and a slight incline on the head.

7:24pm: Tess likes a long flagpole, apparently. Poor Vernon.

7:28pm: Louise: "I definitely feel like I'm in Blackpool". you are.

7:28pm: Shit. Louise can walk down stairs.

7:29pm: Louise and Kevin are essentially dancing my wife's and my relationship.

7:31pm: Tess' patronising "Look at your little smiley face" comment to Louise made me want to punch someone.

7:35pm: Danny always looks like he should be in an advert for Gillette.

7:36pm: Danny's very, very, very, very good. He's very good.

7:39pm: Putin on the Ritz.


7:44pm: Ed Balls even plays the piano; can we have him as Prime Minister and President, please?

7:45pm: Ed had better give that floor piano back to Tom Hanks.

7:49pm: Ed Balls always manages to surprise you with his ability. Good lad.

7:50pm: Coincidentally, Ed Balls' score was my PIN.

7:53pm: Blackpool is perhaps the only week when everyone genuinely wants to go home.

7:55pm: Greg Rutherford's come as Matt Smith-era Doctor Who.

8:05pm: Something tells me @glyndoggett will enjoy Judge Rinder's choice of music (a man who owns the Special Edition of Spice World).

8:07pm: I just said to my wife "I'm very depressed that Ore's four years younger than me". Her response: "Four and a half".

8:09pm: Appearing on next year's #Strictly: Tony Blair.

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