Wednesday, 31 August 2016

GBBO 2016: Volume Two (31.08.16)

Today saw the second instalment of this year's series of the Bake Off, which I watched with the fingers of one hand poised on my mobile's Twitter app, and the other hovering over the biscuit barrel; I like to multi-task.

See below for a round-up of my sweet-treat tweets, thus marking the third day running of Twitter-based blog posts; it seems that after Edinburgh, I can only write in 140-character bursts.

8:01pm: Mel's hood makes her look like Rod Stewart.
8:04pm: The strings underscoring #GBBO are played by the Hollywood, Berry, Perkins and Giedroyc Quartet. 
8:05pm: Val's ice cream anecdote was worthy of Parkinson. 
8:07pm: Tom packing a sausage = FOOD PORN.

12:08pm: Benjamina's not a name.

8:11pm: I like how the colour of Paul Hollywood's beard fades into his shirt.

8:14pm: Paul & Mary's challenge: make 24 identical biscuits. David's challenge: to eat 24 identical biscuits before the end of segment.

8:16pm: The downside to the first few episodes in the current #GBBO series: you don't know which faces you're destined to forget. 
8:18pm: Val's biscuits look like the sort of thing I'd make (which isn't a compliment).

8:19pm: Every shot of Paul Hollywood should come with a wah-wah pedal accompaniment.

8:23pm: Paul's shirt even matches with the tablecloth.

8:24pm: Running your fingers through Paul Hollywood's hair would cut them to shreds.

8:26pm: Rav's piping is reminiscent of me on the toilet.

8:29pm: Who wants to eat a blown-on-by-Val biscuit?

8:32pm: Andrew looks like a ginger Eddie Redmayne.

8:36pm: Selasi could punch you into the New Year.

8:37pm: I'd pay to see a Paul Hollywood / Selasi Stare-off.

8:40pm: In tribute to this wk's gingerbread challenge, I'm baking a frieze of Stevenage Town Centre, complete with clock tower, statue & chav.

8:42pm: My windows are made from boiled sweets too.

8:43pm: I bow to Selasi's coolness and self-control.

8:47pm: This isn't good for my blood pressure.

8:48pm: Candice's pub is excellent.

8:50pm: Val and Louise could sell their gingerbread stories in broken biscuit boxes at Poundstretcher.

8:50pm: I have a problem with finishing too.

8:53pm: I dubbed the crunching sounds in post-production.

8:55pm: Mary will eat a bit of carpet. No comment.

8:55pm: Candice's The King Bill sounds like a censored swear.

8:57pm: Val's eyes have no pupils.

8:58pm: Val rocks a gilet. 

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