What to Do?

I haven't really achieved much today, but I guess that's to be expected, considering the circumstances.

 Yesterday, I cancelled the last of four proposed work-in-progress dates on the Brighton Fringe, which was another run pulled to match my two shows on the Bath Fringe in April. This was a shame as they were put in the diary to help me work towards this year's Edinburgh, but in all honesty, I haven't written anything new anyway, as most of my time had been taken up with looking after my dad. I wouldn't have wanted this to be different - this was inevitably my priority, but it does leave me feeling unfunny and unprepared.

 There's still time to turn this around, however, particularly as I always intended to treat this year's Edinburgh as an unofficial Best Of, with the work-in-progress dates there to give me a chance to see if the muse struck, more so for the future than for now. The only potential issue is the lack of previews booked in between now and August, as my mind just hasn't been on that, though perhaps I'll be able to the usual trick of booking a couple of dates in Cambridge in June and July to plug the gap.

 If I'm honest, I'm totally uninterested in it. I've been pretty uninterested all year, which is partly a symptom of what's been going on, combined with my general frustration with doing everything on my own. I should probably have officially taken a year off the treadmill of writing a show as creativity is not a bottomless pit. I'm starting to wonder if I've wasted too much time ploughing the stand-up furrow, but that's probably more to do with the situation than anything else.

 It's definitely proving to be a hard year, what with losing a parent and, to a much lesser extent, losing my PIP. I feel like I'm longing for something nice to happen to reinvigorate my life, but what it is, I'm not sure.

 Mostly Comedy's been pretty aggravating too, what with the change of venue. In many ways, this was a blessing in disguise, as it quickly became clear after a meeting with The Sun's new management that it wasn't going to work there anymore, plus I won't have to experience the sadness of expecting to see my dad sat in the back right corner. A new home could mean a fresh outlook. We'll just have to wait and see.

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