I'll Take You to Burn.
Few products fill me with more trepidation than Poundland fireworks & bacon.
The worrying thing about the former in the Hitchin store is they’ve been displayed right by the counter, which makes for a tense queuing experience. That’s where you normally position stock most likely to provoke an impulse buy, which isn’t exactly their remit, unless you’ve been hit by the urge to commit a dangerous prank involving a letterbox; let's face it: whoever purchases fireworks last-minute either wants them for a nefarious reason or isn't a safe pair of hands to put on a small-scale display.
There’s a more concerning undercurrent to proceedings and that’s the fact the fireworks presumably cost just a pound each; another reason to be concerned about standing next to them while waiting for a till to be free, let alone attempting to light one. How many corners were cut to guarantee such cheap overheads? Selling bacon for a quid's not much better; what hopelessly deformed pigs they must have been.
It’s not just storing fireworks by the checkouts that bothers me; it’s what they’re stored in: they’re kept in those baskets that are usually reserved for bargain bins, which suggests they think you'll grab a load without counting them and without prior arrangement; and I thought a handful of Daniel O’Donnell CDs was dangerous enough.
The worrying thing about the former in the Hitchin store is they’ve been displayed right by the counter, which makes for a tense queuing experience. That’s where you normally position stock most likely to provoke an impulse buy, which isn’t exactly their remit, unless you’ve been hit by the urge to commit a dangerous prank involving a letterbox; let's face it: whoever purchases fireworks last-minute either wants them for a nefarious reason or isn't a safe pair of hands to put on a small-scale display.
There’s a more concerning undercurrent to proceedings and that’s the fact the fireworks presumably cost just a pound each; another reason to be concerned about standing next to them while waiting for a till to be free, let alone attempting to light one. How many corners were cut to guarantee such cheap overheads? Selling bacon for a quid's not much better; what hopelessly deformed pigs they must have been.
It’s not just storing fireworks by the checkouts that bothers me; it’s what they’re stored in: they’re kept in those baskets that are usually reserved for bargain bins, which suggests they think you'll grab a load without counting them and without prior arrangement; and I thought a handful of Daniel O’Donnell CDs was dangerous enough.
