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Eton Mess.


I’m not going to mince my words, because I don’t think it’s necessary: Jacob Rees-Mogg is full of shit.

I don’t know what makes the quasi-Edwardian bond villain think he’s spokesman for the nation and Chief Righter-of-wrongs within the Tory Party (and saver of Brexit, which is an impossibility in-and-of itself), but his confidence is misplaced; the idea that a man who'd conceivably wear a stovepipe hat about the house to be casual is likely to win over the country with his rhetoric is about as plausible as me portraying Richard Pryor in a Richard Pryor biopic.

(By which I mean, “slim to none".)

It was while reading an article today on the BBC News website that Rees-Mogg got my goat (and sacrificed it to Beelzebub, drinking its blood in the process for he looks the sort). The piece - which inevitably covered Mogg's attempt to gather the right amount of letters expressing no confidence in Theresa May to trigger a Tory leadership contest (because that will help speed up his beloved exit of the EU) - included the following quote from the man who, if he were a Roger Hargreaves character, would be called Mr Entitlement:

From the mouth of Mogg.

What bugs me most about this is I don’t think he believes it for a second; like majority of the Brexiteers throwing their spanners into the metaphorical works of May’s draft agreement, he’s thinking only of himself, and is scaremongering to suit his own ends at the expense of our future. What we need now is honesty, but his isn’t a party for whom that’s a natural state; after all, if his cohorts Johnson and Gove hadn’t lied so habitually in the lead-up to the EU referendum to then scarper when they got what they wanted, we wouldn’t be in this mess in the first place. Fuck off, Jacob Rees-Mogg, and take your draconian affectations with you, you feckless gimp.
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