Comedy in a Vacuum.

Today was a classic 'me day'.

The big event was the preview I had booked in at The Actors' Temple on Warren Street; a preview I ended up having to cancel as I only had one person booked in. Some people can barely scrape an audience in double figures; I barely get more than just myself. To be fair, it's often the way with Edinburgh previews; there are so many going on that the market is saturated, and mine didn't have the intrigue of being part of a double bill that could draw in more than one fan base (I use the phrase 'fan base' very loosely).

I knew the state of the numbers earlier on the day, but went through the motions, in case they picked up. The biggest frustration was I had to find a way to carry all of the equipment I needed for it on the train by myself (my wife brought things with her as well when she joined me, but she couldn't leave for London until she finished work). It wasn't so much thaqt the equipment specific to the show that was the problem; more that I had to take sound equipment too, as the venue doesn't have a P.A.

Glyn's and my techie friend extraordinaire Paul had agreed to loan me a speaker to plumb the mic and the audio from the slideshow into, which he'd left on a trolley at The Sun Hotel for me to pick up, but when I went to collect it, I soon realised there was no way on God's Earth I'd be able to fit it into a taxi, let alone drag it along with everything else. So, in the end, I had no choice but to go to the local electronics shop and buy an emergency guitar amp to take in its place. Thankfully, I'm made of money.

(Spot the sarcasm.)

Though I didn't have a show, the evening wasn't wasted, expensive though it was. I did a run at the venue while my wife took a few notes (which I haven't heard yet: watch this space). It may have ended up being a costly and awkward-to-get-to rehearsal, but it was useful to do. I still think it would work better with an audience.

Shakerpuppetmaker.

Have Parker from Thunderbirds and Noel Gallagher ever been seen in the same room? The resemblance is uncanny. So much so, I think something’s afoot. If my suspicions are correct, I've stumbled across a secret that will blow the music and puppet industry wide apart. In the mid-60s / mid-90s at least. It doesn’t take long to see the signposts. There’s the similarity between the name of Oasis’ first single, Supersonic, and Supermarianation, Gerry Anderson’s puppetry technique. The Gallagher brothers would often wear Parkas . Live Forever was clearly a reference to Captain Scarlet and Standing on the Shoulder of Giants to the size difference between Noel and his bandmates. The more you think about it, the more brazen it gets. It’s fishier than Area 51, Paul is Dead and JFK's assassination put together. The only glitch to the theory is scale . According to Wikipedia, Anderson’s marionettes were 1’10” and Gallagher is 5’8”. How does he maintain an illusion of avera...

"Speaking Words of Wisdom, Let it Shine."

Tonight saw the second instalment of BBC1’s latest advertise-a-musical-for-months-and-then-cast-it-with-performers-too-inexperienced-to-do-it-a-thon ‘Let it S̶h̶i̶t̶e̶ Shine’ (or as I call it: ‘REAL AUDITIONS ARE NOTHING LIKE THIS’). I didn’t watch it (clearly), but being reminded of how angry seeing just five minutes of it made me last week caused me to mull over what I would call a musical based on the band’s songbook, if I was responsible for it. Here are a my suggestions: IDEAS FOR TITLE OF A TAKE THAT MUSICAL: Barlow! Dirty Fat-Dancing Orange! A Million Love-changes-everything Songs Owen! Howard's End Pray Misérables Mamma Marka! Babe (with a pig as the lead) …BUT MY FAVOURITE HAS TO BE: Jason & His Amazing Technicolour Dreamcoat. "It was Orange, Orange, Orange, Orange..." (TAKE) THAT’S ENOUGH OF (TAKE) THAT.

'...I'm Gonna Look at You 'til My Eyes Go Blind."

Over the past week or two, I’ve been on a bit of a Sheryl Crow kick, largely thanks to rediscovering her cover of one of my most-liked Bob Dylan songs. She has one of my favourite female voices, yet despite this, I only own one CD and that’s just a single (her '97 release ‘Hard to Make a Stand’); on that basis, you can only imagine how much of her back catalogue I’d own if I hated her (it would fall into minus-figures). Dylan, conversely, takes up more of my collection than anyone else, save The Beatles and Paul McCartney’s solo work. He’s one of those artists who, when you get him, you really get him - and once I’d tuned into his style as a student, I'd time and again be blown away by his lyrics; he’ll have more jaw-dropping imagery in one track than other people fit in a whole career. These days, I mostly listen to music in the morning when getting ready, and more often than not, this will consist of a suggested YouTube playlist when I’m in the bath, r...

mostly david ephgrave

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