High and Dry.


I'm in love with my dehumidifier.

Perhaps I've pitched my appreciation for my most recently acquired household appliance too highly. I don’t want my affection to be misconstrued; you need to be careful about what you put on the Internet. I’m not attracted to my dehumidifier. I don’t crave intimacy with it. I’ve never dreamt of us growing old together; both living off my comfortable pension (ha); me, surprisingly sprightly in my late nineties, and my beloved EcoAir ECO DD122 Desiccant Dehumidifier still fully functioning, despite having long been rendered obsolete.

When I say I’m in love with it, what I actually mean is it's extremely satisfying to use. There’s something strangely rewarding about emptying its two-litre reservoir at the end of the day, even though the only part I played in the deal was switching it on. Still, it couldn’t have done it without me.

What is this new-found fascination with moisture removal? It’s like my Window Vac obsession all over again. Whatever the reason, I now know what I want for for Christmas: one of those sucky pipes that dentists put in your mouth when they’re working on your teeth. Or do they only do that to me?

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