Life in the Fast (Food) Lane.


As I waited to board the bus today, a man alighted eating chicken and chips.

It seems we’ve reached the nadir of human existence. The passenger gnawing on a bone as he stepped off the 100 to Baldock unwittingly sounded the death knell. Antisocial behavior is the way forward. It’s each man for himself.

The bus driver was too perplexed to do anything about it. It was so far past the realms of decency, it left him powerless. We shared a moment of disdain for the chicken-eater as I got on. I then walked down the gangway and straight into the aroma of fried food from the past. There’s nothing like sitting in a hermetically sealed environment that reeks of non-specific chicken limbs to put you off the foodstuff for life

(...so speaks the vegetarian.)

I was once told off for trying to bring a cup of tea onto the bus. The driver spoke to me like I was about to commit a cardinal sin. What would he have made of today’s KFC incident? I've been top trumped.

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