St. Evenage


Never underestimate the power of Stevenage Town Centre for lowering your morale.

I was only there for an hour this afternoon, which was still enough time to create a negative impact. It’s just so bleak. I swear it didn’t used to be like this; when I grew up there, I was its biggest defender, but I may have been looking through the rose-tinted spectacles of youth. Whatever the case, there’s been a definite decline; what was once an aspiring new town is now the sort of place to avoid eye contact at all costs. God forbid you ever stand out.

The main thing going against it is the logistics; where was the sense in building the town centre so far away from the residential areas? Damn those new town planners. Damn them to Hell.

Perhaps the most depressing thing I saw on my visit to Stevenage was the Santa’s Grotto in Westgate Shopping Centre. Surely no child would be foolish enough to think the real Santa would set up shop there. Which reminds me indirectly of my favourite festive equation:

Christmas = Christ’s volume x Christ’s density

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