"They're Not Laughing Now."

And so Mostly Comedy has closed.

Our closure statement (26.04.2022).

Arriving at this decision was difficult. It went against my natural-born instinct to keep things going at all costs. My brain has an annoying habit of defining what I do on the times when it isn't plain sailing at the exclusion of any evidence to the contrary, and this was no exception. But the fact is the circumstances we found ourselves in thanks to the pandemic were unprecedented and extremely hard to fight, particularly when you have so little money to start with and are constantly calling in favours from friends to make the shows run smoothly on the day.

Pre-show audience at a Hitchin Town Hall Mostly Comedy (June 2019)

The sad thing is I had visions of it carrying on long into the future, though if I could find a way to outsource some of the admin, that would've helped. I liked the idea of reaching our twentieth anniversary - we were already close to our fourteenth - as, for some reason, the idea that it ran for that long would make it feel real. Like a proper thing, whatever that is. But at least the spanner in the works that scuppered us was a world event entirely out of our control. Or at least the prominent cause was.

While our statement explains the crux of the reason for our closure, there were other extenuating circumstances too. The dynamic behind anything that runs for so long is always complicated. For some time, Glyn's heart wasn't in the club while I kept chivvying it along, mainly because I still felt the spark of promise in Doggett & Ephgrave if we could find time to invest in it; something our podcast More Than Mostly Comedy reinforced. But for many reasons, that wasn't an option, and it had reached the point where I was spinning so many plates to keep Mostly going while Glyn grew more distant from it due to a genuine lack of availability. Then toward the end of last year, he told me he didn't want to do Mostly Comedy specifically anymore, which coincided with me reaching the apex of my disillusionment with all the work involved. And knowing I'd have to do even more without him only compounded it.

Doggett & Ephgrave soundcheck before Neil Innes' appearance (03.10.19)

When I saw that today's proposed show still hadn't broken even last Friday, I pragmatically went through my remaining options, from soldiering onto our last advertised date in May to pulling both shows and closing immediately. I decided to make the final call on Monday, subject to whether we broke even by then. I also made a list of reasons I was still doing Mostly Comedy beyond my obvious care for it. And the three prime answers were "to work with Glyn", "to write new material", and "to earn some money". And when I realised that none of those still happened, I knew the game was up. Without my criteria met, for whom was I doing it? And when we still hadn't covered our costs with three days to go, that was that.

That's not to say there won't come a time in the future when we might try again. But the level of commitment I gave it through the years isn't sustainable when it overwhelms everything else I want to do. And while the finances are the main factor, it's also the case that at this point, neither Glyn nor I can give it the level of commitment needed to keep it going. And without at least one of us, it can't happen, or at least not under the banner of Mostly Comedy. Though that's not to say other people can't book shows if they want to, though for my sanity - at least for a little while - I need it not to be me.

Explaining Norman Lovett at The Sun.

Despite all of this, I still cycle between thinking I've done the right thing and worrying that I should have just persevered. But a lot of that's to do with an often misplaced expectation in myself to keep going irrespective of whether it's still healthy (like doing this somehow proves my worth) and that it's my job to fill every gap. But neither point's true, and I know that deep down, however my muscle memory chooses to interpret it. And stopping now doesn't undo all the extraordinary things Mostly Comedy accomplished. Nothing can do that. And the roster of big names that joined us on the bill speaks for itself, as does the string of emails filling our inbox since Tuesday's announcement from people telling us how much they valued the club. We've had scores of tweets and comments on Facebook and Instagram too. We'll get back to them in time, but rest assured that we can't thank you enough for your support. Because to quote what I said at every gig after we listed that evening's lineup, "All in all, it's going to be a great night". And, all in all, it was.

Just some of the replies filling our inbox since Tuesday's mailing list announcement.