Subpar Me.


Yesterday, I had my first casting for a few weeks. 

Unfortunately, it didn’t go as well as I would have liked. This was due to a combination of not being on form (I have a rotten cold) and the job not being quite right for me. What pleased me most was I didn’t take this to heart.

When you’re an actor, you don’t get a lot of outside affirmation. You have to keep yourself on an even keel when things don’t go well and keep your own standards in check. A director seldom tells you when you get something right, but will give you a raft of notes when you get it wrong. Or maybe that’s just me. The psychological scales are often tipped toward the negative.

(Is that a clear analogy?)

When I left the casting suite yesterday, I didn’t ruminate about the audition (other than keeping it in mind to write this). I knew I hadn’t got the job, but I didn’t let it get to me. It helped that I somewhere to be. Not only that, I came out to an answerphone message from my agent about another audition today. It’s always good to have another opportunity in the pipeline. However it goes, I'll try to approach it with the same attitude – though it would be nice for me to not be as rubbish as I was yesterday. Don’t let it be said that I have high expectations; it's all about small steps.

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