I find Starburst’s new tag line ‘Unexplainably Juicy’ a little ominous. If there’s anyone who should be able to explain their juiciness it’s them. Don’t they know their own recipe? I can’t believe that they start each day from scratch, without working to a formula. That would be madness. You couldn’t run a successful business with such a lackadaisical attitude. Perhaps they stumbled across the mixture by chance. It could be a compound that just shouldn’t work on paper. God knows what goes into them: it could be parmesan, horse’s eyelids, Pepto-Bismol, anything . Personally, I think you’re better off with a pack of Chewits. They’re aren’t many sweets on the market with a name that doubles up as an instruction manual. Maltesers are just racist.
A blog from the actormusocomic. "Devastatingly witty" (EdFestMag)