mostly david ephgrave

The roof of my friend Steve’s new Mercedes isn’t high enough to accommodate my hairstyle. It’s annoying that he didn’t take this into consideration when he bought it. He’s aware of my lofty barnet. I know he was tied to a timeframe and a budget, but he could have shopped around a little longer, or at least spent some money on modifying the ceiling above the passenger seat to fit my quasi-quiff in. As it stands (the situation, not my hair) he’ll wind up with a waxy patch front-left, which is not my fault, but is. I’m not compromising my style to protect his interior. Having said that, I’ll make a concession. My hair’s recent extra height had led to structural difficulties; so much so that I’d moved up a Silvikrin strength. The additional inches above sea level meant greater wind resistance too; it was like having a drogue parachute above my head. Yesterday, I bit the bullet and had a haircut. I still think Steve will benefit more from this than me. Through being slowed dow...

I bet this man’s favourite Beatle is Paul. Don’t let the Wilburys t-shirt fool you. It’s all in the hair. While it may be strawberry blond, there’s no mistaking that cut: it’s a mid-Nineties Macca if ever I saw it. I'm glad he’s gone for an age-appropriate McCartney hairstyle, rather than mimicking Paul’s heyday. It would be embarrassing if he'd plumped for a Sixties moptop. This morning's BBC Breakfast featured an item on artificial intelligence in which Louise Minchin interviewed a scientist who was clearly in his fifties, yet was sporting a Maharishi-era Lennon barnet that he couldn’t pull off, both literally and figuratively. It was as embarrassing as the awkward presenter / robot banter that ensued. Not that I can’t empathise with the man above or the android-loving scientist. I’ve made my own Fab-Four-follicular-faux-pas in the past. I remember taking the sleeve for McCartney’s lesser-known 1987 single ‘Once Upon a Long A...