mostly david ephgrave

I managed to do a little gentle writing today, which was good, though the piece I was working on still needs finishing. What I really miss, which I’ve said here before, is someone to collaborate with. I haven’t had this for so long, I almost can’t remember what it’s like, other than knowing how much easier it is to see an idea through to completion. Even a solo performer requires someone to bounce off of, or at the very least a director, but I never have this either; put simply, no-one would be interested in doing it, which is very dispiriting. I’m finding this lack of a sounding board particularly hard at the moment, as I approach writing my fourth solo show in three years. My three previous shows really were very different to each other; perhaps more so than necessary. Of the lot, the last one - ‘Now Who’s a Comedian?’ - felt the most like I was pulling out all the stops, and while it wasn't perfect (there definitely were parts particularly i...

I’ve only got two more performances of last year’s show to go - tonight in London and next month in Leicester - and while I’m still proud of it, I realised yesterday why it’s so hard to keep hold of that. When I first performed a skeleton version of it at Bath Comedy Festival last April, I was already happy with the reaction it got; for me, it was nice to be doing something fresh, plus I was fortunate enough that the audience enjoyed it at this early stage. The following month I took a slightly more polished version to the Brighton Fringe which also went down well, and this continued to build across the various previews in June and July and into the (allegedly) finished version to Edinburgh. The problem psychologically is the negative by-product you pick up along the way. In most cases, every show is the first time that audience has seen it, yet inevitably I’ve been to every one (it would be weird it I wasn’t); and while there’s nothing wrong with having to approach it afr...

Yesterday, I finished registering my work-in-progress dates at the Brighton Fringe next May and booked in a performance of ‘Now Who’s a Comedian?’ at the Etcetera Theatre toward the end of January, to plug the gap between now and my show at Leicester Comedy Festival in February , thus setting the wheels creaking into motion for 2018. It felt good to get back on my feet following last week’s unpleasant review, instead of stewing for too long on it, though I won’t deny, it hasn’t left my mind quite yet; it’s frustrating to be grappling with unnecessary self-doubt as I consider my next move, as any creative person has enough of this to contend with, without someone else sticking their head around the door to shout, “You’re SHIT”, before buggering off again. It’s just so tiresome. I’m already struggling to face the idea of working up something new to have to waste time bolstering myself from an outsider’s negative commentary; my brain ignores positive ...

Last week, Steve Bennett from Chortle reviewed my show - the second time I’ve been graced with his presence - and once again I found myself on the receiving end of a write-up that's little more than a character assassination from a bully with a website. At least this wasn’t my first run-in, so I knew what to expect, but it doesn’t make his flagrant nastiness much easier to take. I assume he'd argue that it’s par-for-the-course, but I think it truly isn’t, and it’s particularly galling to be subjected to such persistent, reiterative abuse from a man who didn’t even pay for his ticket. My issue with his critique is there’s very little constructiveness to it. Since the rise of Simon Cowell this vicious, malicious, vindictive feedback has been in vogue, and all it does is destruct creativity; not enjoying someone’s work is one thing, but there’s no need to turn the knife.  The last time he reviewed me , I was at the early stages of attempting stand-up alone after a ...

Today’s show was lovely, which was exactly what I needed after a day off. I made the most of yesterday’s break by climbing Nelson’s Monument on Carlton Hill. It was perfect weather for it, with plenty of people lazing around on the hilltop, making the most of the sun. The view from the top of the Monument is impressive; Princes Street is strikingly straight, and the castle looks strangely small, considering how imposing it looks from the ground. Princes Street from the top of the Monument. It’s not the first time I’ve been on Carlton Hill. The last time I was there was when I went on a short break to Edinburgh with my now-wife a decade ago (in the sense that we weren’t married then; I’m planning to have another one). Somewhere amongst my collection are a handful of pictures we took that day, including one of our faces reflected in the brass plaque at the bottom of the Monument, which I tried to recreate yesterday, but couldn’t line it up right; perhaps my hea...

Today, I reached a turning point regarding how to approach my forthcoming solo stand-up show; something that now seems so obvious, I feel stupid for not looking at it this way previously. For some reason, I've got into the mindset that the material I write for myself has to be very different style to what I do with Glyn. This made sense when I first started gigging alone, as I didn’t want to feel I was retracing Doggett & Ephgrave’s footsteps without forging an identity of my own. It was also a question of logistics, as I thought it might be difficult to get solo spots at clubs still using a projector – not to mention having to carry the equipment to venues by myself. Now I’m a year into doing gigs on my own, I’ve proved I can do comedy without the aid of a slideshow. I’m not sure why this was important to me, but it was. I guess it was partly because I liked the idea of challenging myself, as well as the thought of not having to lug the gear around to shows, which...

Five words, uttered nonchalantly by the Etcetera Theatre’s Duty Manager after tonight’s show that put the fear of God in me: “You had three press in” . What made her comment more alarming was there were only nine people in the audience. The ‘crowd’ watching my show this evening was one-third reviewers. There was a journalist for every pair of standard punters. I think I’ve made my point. Me, with sign, tonight. It will be interesting to hear what they think, particularly now the show starts with a brief dissection of my unfavourable Chortle review. Will this win friends or gain enemies? I’ll have to wait and see. Hopefully they came from different sources, for variety. I'm delighted to have such a great journalistic turnout (the best I’ve ever had), daunting though it may be. The show was okay for a first night. I was a little flustered by the get-in and took a little while to relax. The audience were quiet in places, which makes more s...

I spent the morning of my thirty-fourth birthday (which is today) walking my mum’s dog. It was a nice way to spend it. He’s always pleased to see me and he’s good company. I tend to walk him most Thursdays, but I haven’t been able to for the last few weeks, due to other commitments. I think he still remembered me, though he’d probably give the same enthusiastic reaction to anyone who turned up at the door. He’s not much of a guard dog, that boy. I began the day by running for the bus. This is always a good way to start. By the time I sat down, I was sweating copiously. I was surrounded by teenagers on their way to school; all far more comfortable in their own skin at that moment than me. How can this be the case, when I’m in my mid-thirties? The more I tried to control my perspiration, the worse it got. I looked like a human water feature. I managed to get my secretory glands in control by the time I got off, which was a relief. I didn’t wa...

Today started with a feeling of positivity about where I'm at with my show, which was swiftly scuppered by reading a scathing review of it. I know the clichés - it's just one person's opinion, and getting negative write-ups are all part of the game - but it still hurts; mainly because I can't compete with the reach the source will get. ‎This isn't a concern because some of copy isn’t complimentary; more because it reveals a frustratingly large amount of the show's content in just a few short paragraphs.  It’s like seeing its key stories and punchlines resorted to bullet points. It takes away the element of surprise. I didn’t expect a Dummies Guide to ‘…and Ephgrave’ but I got it, or for my show to be available as York Notes. It’s a spoiler akin to Channel Four’s one-time advert for ‘The Shawshank Redemption’, which started with the prison governor throwing a rock at Raquel Welch. (I hope I haven't just made the same mistake myself.) When you’re work...