The Unwitting Attack.

Today I had a German couple walk out towards the beginning of the show, with the guy telling me he liked me as a person, but didn’t find me funny; proof that to be a comedian you need a cast-iron mental constitution.

It was actually a wonderful moment as it brought everyone else onside. It was hilarious in its preciseness, thus fitting perfectly to the German stereotype. I walked into it when I spotted them whispering to each other and asked what was wrong. What made it so funny was he seemed to think by saying he liked me he'd spared my feelings while he'd actually accidentally aimed right for the jugular; whether he found me comedic or not, I'm content in the knowledge I still have his money; what people choose to do after purchasing their ticket is entirely up to them (within reason).

There aren’t many jobs on the planet where people feel more inclined to give you unwarranted feedback than being a performer, however successful you may be; I’ve had people who watched me play Buddy Holly tell me they enjoyed what I did but couldn’t see my face as it was obscured by the microphone, so maybe I should consider moving further away from it...and family friends tell me my band would be better if we were more like Shed Seven, so I’ve definitely got form; I’d just sooner not be told these things eyeball-to-eyeball mid-show when given the choice.

 

In reality this sort of thing is a gift when the rest of the audience are with you as it gives you more to play with to give the show extra energy and provides you with a running joke. All you can do when it happens is kill the culprit with kindness, as there’s no point in laying into them; don't forget the second bit though, as there are laws against the first bit on its own. Thankfully everyone else was lovely and the reaction was still good, with most people telling me on the way out how unbelievable they thought his comment was. What kind of person has the balls to say that sort of thing to someone else? Was für ein Scheißkopf.