Skip to main content

'University Challenged 2016/17: Volume Eleven (17.10.16)


I rushed back from an Old Man Pub Crawl with my friend Stephen tonight to live-tweet along to University Challenge; a sentence that’s as depressing as it is dull. That’s not to say I wasn’t having a good time out - I was - but we both had our priorities, which consisted of watching the Liverpool match for Steve, and being snarky about a load of students for me.

See below for examples of me at my snarkiest; snarky, snarky me.

Jesus Cambridge Vs. Queens' Cambridge (17.10.16)

8:02pm: It's Monday evening. It's just gone 8pm. It's time for another round of Spot the Gimp.

8:03pm: Paxman's had a haircut. No more Wendy Craig.

8:05pm: Fairbrother is a cross between Bob Mortimer's son in House of Fools & Steve Coogan's teen 'Keanu Reeves' in Saxondale.

8:07pm: Morris Clarke looks like a wrong Osmond.

8:07pm: Price used to front The Cure.

8:09pm: Venturini looks like a cross between a non-green Big Green Giant and a non-green Incredible Hulk.

8:10pm: Fairbrother's hair. Discuss. Disgust.

8:11pm: Every "Jesus" from Roger Tilling sounds like an exclamation of disgust.

8:12pm: Syvret's shiny, shiny shirt makes him no less emotionless.

8:14pm: Because anyone wearing a sleeveless top on #UniversityChallenge WOULD have a bowl haircut.

8:15pm: Morris Clarke's smug, smiley Jimmy Osmond face.

8:16pm: Adamson is a watered-down Syvret.

8:16pm: Jesus Cambridge's mascot is, appropriately, a cock.

8:19pm: Morris Clarke and Jeremy Paxman sharing a smile at the mention of Led Zeppelin; Blues Rock enthusiasts.

8:20pm: Queens' Adamson appears to be experiencing grief.

8:22pm: Can someone undo Syvret's top button, please? Many thanks.

8:24pm: Syret and Adamson look like they saw something terrible on the way to the studio that they'll never, ever forget.

8:27pm: Snip snip snip went the scissors circling Fairbrother's head. Snip snip snip went the scissors around his sleeves.

8:28pm: "Jesus, Fairbrother." His mum, when he returned from the barbers'.
Labels:

Popular posts from this blog

Not The Bayeux One.

The Carole King album Tapestry has been my 'getting-ready-in-the-morning' soundtrack for the past few weeks.  It's been a favourite album ever since I was a student, which makes for a pleasantly gentle way to usher in the start of a day. I've always been a fan of a well-crafted song, which is something of a Carole King hallmark, ever since she started writing with her first husband in the early Sixties. Tapestry may be an unimaginative choice for a favourite LP, as it suggests I haven't delved that far into her career, but it's still an undoubted classic; anything with '(You Make Me Feel Like A) Natural Woman', 'Will You Still Love Me Tomorrow?' and 'You've Got A Friend' on it can't really fail; if nothing else, it proves she likes writing songs with long titles.  Next month, she's set to perform the album live in its entirety for the first time at a gig in Hyde Park, which I would have loved to have gone to, if it weren...
Read more

Shakerpuppetmaker.

Have Parker from Thunderbirds and Noel Gallagher ever been seen in the same room? The resemblance is uncanny. So much so, I think something’s afoot. If my suspicions are correct, I've stumbled across a secret that will blow the music and puppet industry wide apart. In the mid-60s / mid-90s at least. It doesn’t take long to see the signposts. There’s the similarity between the name of Oasis’ first single, Supersonic, and Supermarianation, Gerry Anderson’s puppetry technique. The Gallagher brothers would often wear Parkas . Live Forever was clearly a reference to Captain Scarlet and Standing on the Shoulder of Giants to the size difference between Noel and his bandmates. The more you think about it, the more brazen it gets. It’s fishier than Area 51, Paul is Dead and JFK's assassination put together. The only glitch to the theory is scale . According to Wikipedia, Anderson’s marionettes were 1’10” and Gallagher is 5’8”. How does he maintain an illusion of avera...
Read more

Hitchin is Mine.

As of six o’clock tonight, I take over the Hitchin is Yours Twitter account for a week; a stewardship I’m anxious to get right. I’m proud of my hometown. It’s a great place to live, with so much going for it. I've always sold it to my non-Hitchinite friends; so much so, that a lot have gone on to move here. Any town expansion plans are partly my fault. Feel free to picket outside my house. I love its history and architecture. Take St Mary’s Church, for example. The building is beautiful inside and out, and huge for a town of our size. There has been a place of worship on site since the 7 th Century. Much of the present building dates from the 1300s. You wouldn't get that in America. (Don't forget the British Schools Museum too.)  Hitchin is a hive for creative people and a hub for the arts. It boast two theatres, two comedy clubs, a couple of art galleries, a festival for world music and a thriving music scene. This drew...
Read more