Swearcut.

Since renting an office above a salon, I've learnt that hairdressers love to swear and smoke.

They do both almost constantly. Every day is one long, cuss-ridden fag break. If you charted their weekly cigarette-lighting / scissor-wielding ratio, the former statistic would come out on top. If the women in the shop below keep smoking at this rate, they’ll wind up cutting hair from inside an iron lung. Which would be very cumbersome.

That’s not to say all stylists are the same. I used to live above a barbershop. While the owner smoked the occasional rollup, he wouldn't do it to excess. He’d also carefully tailor his language to suit his customers.

This could be a generational thing. He was in his sixties, while the staff below are in their early twenties. He also worked alone, so long breaks wouldn’t have been cost-efficient.

I worry about their health. Smoking so much when so young can’t be good. Cutting down would help me too. It would ease my RSI from always opening and closing my office window.