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Face in the Crowd.


Eagle-eyed viewers of this Wednesday & Thursday’s editions of Pointless may have spotted the back of my head in the studio audience. If you did, I’d question both your attention span and sanity.

Where's Wally?

This could be the highlight of my career. If nothing else, it proves I know my place. I don’t belong on the stage. I’m more suited to sitting quietly a few yards in front of it, staying out of trouble. It’s a shame it took so long to reach this realisation; if I’d known it fifteen years ago, I could have saved my dad a fortune in drama school fees.

I should have noticed the signs. While I appeared in a number of TV advertising campaigns in the past (one in just a pair of y-fronts), that was nearly ten years ago. These days, I’m much more likely to be found amongst the proles in the crowd than entrusted with the responsibility of addressing them.

It’s like when I went to see Paul McCartney at Maida Vale Studios.


While I'm in excellent company (that's Vanessa Feltz a few heads to my left and Rob Brydon at the opposite side of the frame), I’m still at a safe distance from the entertainment. Were the powers-that-be suggesting I have less pull than an ex-Beatle? Shockingly, this seems to be the case.

Both examples pale in comparison to the biggie: the time I was within spitting distance of the Queen.


That’s definitely one to show the grandkids.
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