I feel like I've turned a corner with how to approach my show today.
When you work on material for too long, you can start to lose faith in it. This is particularly the case when you run it repeatedly in a room to yourself. Stand-up needs feedback, be it from a director or an audience. Without this, you have nothing to spark off of. You end up trying to entertain yourself - or worse still, over-thinking the delivery of every joke, until they fall flat.
You start to disconnect from your material. It's like doing a long run of a play. After awhile, the lines cease to have any meaning. You could deliver them in your sleep. You stop listening to the other actors, thinking your character's thoughts, or being in the moment. It's the same with stand-up. Your job is to tell a story clearly, truthfully and amusingly, while keeping it fresh. You have to listen to - and connect with - the audience. It's a conversation between you and them. If you go through the motions, they'll smell it a mile off.
This is why I'm looking forward to putting the show back in a small space. The most I've enjoyed it was when I performed it in skeletal form at The Actors' Temple in February. It's a tiny room, that only fits twenty people. It's not big enough for you to be able to disconnect. You're forced into a corner and have to keep your wits about you. It kicks you into gear. I love that.
Even at the Soho Theatre, it still felt like a conversation. This was less the case at Mostly Comedy, where I switched off, and 'performed' a little too much.
When I ran it today, I really enjoyed it. I remembered what the stories were about, that they were mine and mine alone - and that I was allowed to enjoy them. I reinstated a bit of business I did at February's Work in (Hope of) Progress show, which brought the running time up to where I wanted it - and made me to relax. It's something I used to do at the top of the Doggett & Ephgrave show 'Big in Small Places'. It's a little rambly, but it's fun and gets my style across from the off.
Ultimately, I can only approach it as myself. If I try it any other way, it won't work. To paraphrase the oft-forgotten Montell Jordan: "This is how I do it". I'm looking forward to doing it in Brighton, a week from today.